A Mountain of Laundry, a Mountain of Debt

The castle is full of two things: dirty laundry and bad debt. What the queen needs is for the king to increase commerce, enforce the law, be a good husband, and a good father. What the king needs is for the queen to be professional, organized, and thorough. While each is focusing on their strengths (the queen knits while the king markets), the weaknesses (management and accountability) suffer.

It is more than a Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus type of thing. It is more of a non-complementary strength-set kind of thing. Neither one of us wants to manage  our household, our personal finances, or each other. We just want to be able to do whatever we want, whenever we want to. So what happens when we can’t do whatever it is we want to? You get a mountain of laundry, a mountain of debt, and a castle full of frustration and shouting.

Now that we have identified some of the problems, what can we do to work towards resolving them?

1. Seek an accountability partner. See if any of your family, friends, neighbors can or will help you stay accountable. It can be humbling to ask for help because it feels like you’re admitting to failure, but first, realize you are having this feeling, acknowledge it, then let it go. Try this with any limiting thought and see how it will change your life.
2. Seek professional help. Depending on what issues you are facing, this could mean seeking a financial counselor, hiring a maid, or seeing a marriage counselor. Marriage counselors aren’t just for those couples who are just getting married or looking to get a divorce. They can be helpful for management issues like the ones we are facing today.
3. Empathize. Learn to see the world from the other person’s point of view. The queen is responsible for taking care of three kids, 24 hours a day, and being the personal assistant for the king who leaves the house for 10 hours a day, then retreats to his office for another 3 hours each night to continue working. No one day is easier or harder than the other – each has it’s own set of problems and responsibilities.

Marcus Buckingham, an authority on identifying strengths and weaknesses, provides a road map for people to learn how to approach their work by emphasizing their strengths rather than weaknesses. He offers a 6-step plan for 6 weeks of reading and habit-forming action for determine strengths. Buckingham believes that the best way to work is to capitalize on your strengths, identify your strengths and weaknesses, do more of what you are strong at, do less of what you are weak at, and continue to learn and do activities that play to strength. By focusing on your strengths, you will have the most impact in your work and in your life.

And for those who haven’t heard of Dave Ramsey, he is one of the best personal finance coaches around. If you are in debt and want to start “beating debt and building wealth,” then please check out The Total Money Makeover. You can find this book and the series at Amazon. You are highly encouraged to also attend the Financial Peace University, where Dave Ramsey teaches you how to manage your money, so that your money doesn’t manage you.