Would you like the extended warranty? July 30, 2006

YES! SAY YES! My laptop is broken, AGAIN! This time it was covered by the extended warranty and is in California. Power supply failure. You’re probably saying “but Suzanne, doesn’t your husband fix computers?” Yes yes he does, he just doesn’t have time to fix *my* computer, thus we have the extended warranty. I say all this to complain and explain why my already infrequent updates get even more infrequent.

Life is SO busy around here. I’ve been busy knitting, keeping up with the house, a newborn, a toddler and it’s so tiring! And to top it all off, we are heading into canning season. I canned 12 quarts of green beans last week. The tomatoes and pears are headed my way very very soon. My mom has been freezing corn too.

Did I mention that we kept Carmina’s placenta? Well, we did. It’s currently in a bucket frozen in my moms deep freeze surrounded by corn. heh. My mom is a little worried that my stepbrother is going to open it up. I think that’s hilarious actually. I peaked in on it on Saturday and it was so cool. The part I could see was fetal side with that tiny cord. It’s amazing that my body grew that and that fed a baby that lived INSIDE of me. It’s just wild if you ask me.

Anyway, I’m typing this from our living room on our brand new computer. It’s a desktop and it’s the new family computer. (And dude, it’s a dell. heh.) Anyway, this computer is the Media Center edition so it’s like a brand new TIVO and I’m more than a little thrilled with this. I have it programmed to record something every single minute of the day, except for like four hours in the wee hours of morning when all that’s on is paid programming. Erich laughed at me when I told him I actually went through the guide and found stuff to record at times that our favorite shows weren’t on. I just told him that I’m trying to make sure that we really get our money out of buying cable each month. Heh.

I’m procrastinating right now though. Everyone is asleep. I need to bring the IPod over and update the songlists and such because tomorrow we are going to be in the car all morning. I have to run to the bank and do tedious tasks there. And I have to make a stop at half price books and drop off my paperwork at the mothers milk bank. I also need to make a return at Lowes and I’m hoping to go drool inside my local yarn store. So this means I need to get up early and get us out of here and back by the afternoon because the 2 year old turns into a pumpkin at noon. (well not a pumpkin but a pile of screaming toddler.)

Sisters July 21, 2006

More pictures can be found on flickr…

One Month July 15, 2006

I can’t believe it’s been a whole month. Carmina’s been here a whole month. I have a hard time imagining a time without her and I come to realize that she’s always been with me in some form. From a twinkle in my eye, the most intense desire to bring another child into the world, I realize I was fighting to bring her here. Not just any baby, *this* baby. I sometimes wonder if she was fighting just as hard.

I’ve watched her grow since last September. I watched little follicles grow and ripen. Then I cried when I saw that tiny sac with a tiny heartbeat. I’ve watched as she went from a fetal pole, to a little blob of baby, to this skeleton peaking at me through the u/s. We saw the chubby face in the last u/s sucking her fingers and grinning at me, but I never imagined she would be so beautiful. So perfect.

She looks just like Magdalena. And she looks just like Erich. And I see myself in her too. The color of her eyes right now look just like my Dads and they have that same twinkle. I realize that dream is ture. He *is* here. He’s a part of her and me and Magdalena. Most of all, Carmina is herself. She’s a combination of all the people that love her most. She has bits of personality that show themselves everyday. I pick her up and see Erich and feel a wave of love for all three of them. I’m truly blessed. Erich and I both realized just how blessed we are.

I love climbing into bed at night and Erich and I lay and marvel at her size. “She’s so tiny! So Perfect!” I don’t think we ever felt like this with Magdalena. Sure she was tiny and we think she’s perfect to, but we were always anxious for what was ahead. “Just wait till she says Daddy!” or “I can’t wait till she can walk!” With Carmina I find myself saying “you’re growing to fast! stay small!” I’m definitely savoring each moment a little longer.

So I say all this to apologize for my lack of updates. I spend most days running around. Carmina is different from her sister and refuses to be set down for to long. So she snuggles in the sling and then Magdalena comes and takes up the rest of my lap, so there’s no room to type and share. My lap is as full as my heart is at this point. So if you wonder what I’m doing, I’m singing Elmos World while holding that tiny perfect person to my breast. I’m marveling at how wonderful my daughters are and falling in love with my husband constantly over and over again for giving me such a wonderful life. He gave me these wonderful babies that I have the awesome privilege of knowing and loving.

I worked for an entire year to bring a baby into our lives. And she has done so much for me. She brightens my day. She fills a spot in my heart. She fits in. I know now I fought so hard because she is supposed to be here. I won’t say that our family is complete, because I’m not sure that it is. But for now, our hearts are full and our days are filled with smiles and laughter. What more could a Mommy ask for?