It’s raining here. Katrina is well traveled. The winds are picking up and we are about to catch the worst of her, or what is left of the worst. I love the rain, I hate the devastation it has caused, but ah, the rain. It’s going to be glorious to cuddle up in bed with my husband and daughter tonight while the rain pitter patters against the window panes. The great part is that the rain smells like fall. There is a very distinctive smell of summer rain and of fall rain, and this definitely smells like fall. I’m so excited for fall. The beautiful leaves and the cool evenings… **sigh**

Another u/s first thing in the morning. We are getting really close to trigger. My ovaries ache, my head has been pounding since last Wednesday and I’m just ready to have a little baby growing inside of me. Seven, at least one has to stick, right?

3 things I bet aren’t in/on your

Fridge:

1) tylenol suppositories
2) a bunch of fertility drugs
3) a convection oven (on top of my fridge)

Desk:
1) a payoff notice for our car loan (we just refinanced)
2) a four keyboards
3) a bunch of syringes

Car:

1) syringe and needle (these treatments seem to be scattered across my life huh?)
2) cheerios (all over the floor)
3) knitting bag full of yarn and projects

Okay, so I’ve been going along and giving myself injections every day. I’m taking 125 units every night. Saturday morning I went to have an u/s and bloodwork. We saw several follicles and my estradiol level was 135. (They like your estradiol to be around 100.) So alls well.

Today I went back for another u/s and bloodwork. (I’ll be going every other day until trigger.) We saw big fat follicles! I’m not going to spit the number out, but I’m going to make you work for it. I’m going to ask you a question and the answer is the number of follicles. Ready?

How many dwarfs were in Snow White?

I’ll wait for you to get up off the floor when you figure out the number! My estradiol level is 277 today! (They want it to double every two days!) All follicles are between 12mm and 14mm in size. They want the follicles to be 18mm in size to trigger. So they are stepping up my meds to 150 tonight and tomorrow. Wednesday is another u/s and we may trigger sometime between Wednesday and Friday!

So, I’m going to need all the baby dust, sticky egg, healthy sperm, stars in the right line VIBEs you can send me! So excited!

I’m tired. I’m usually not tired anymore during the day. Yesterday I took a nap with Magdalena. I’ve even been laying her down early because I am so tired. It sucks to take these naps though, because that is when I have peace and quiet and time to sit and knit and just be by myself. With Erich gone a lot, I need those two or three hours to just regain myself. ugh.

You guys seem to like it when I talk about my treatment rather than my boring chit chat. No worries, I know I’m boring. **wink** And truthfully the most exciting thing happening right now is my infertility treatment. Anywho.

Last Thursday, I had my drug conference. We went over how to give the shots and such. I found out that we aren’t going to do Repronex (cheap injectibles) like we had previously thought. We are moving straight to the expensive stuff, Follistim AQ. From what I gather from Dr. Google, Repronex was a drug that imitates follicle stimulating hormone. (the hormone that “grows” follicles) The drug that I am taking, Follistim, is actually follicle stimulating hormone. Everyone with me here?

So anyway, after lots of drama talking to my insurance company and getting connected to the people who need to send me the drugs and reminding them that they are paying for them all, I got somone to agree to send it to me by Tuesday (yesterday.)

So last Thursday, we did my baseline u/s. My ovaries look normal, I definitely released the last eggs. In each ovary there were four (or so) tiny follicles. No cysts, so we are free to move on.

So yesterday I started poking myself. It really isn’t that bad though. I managed to put it in a place that was numb (from my csection) and everything was dandy. Today it felt like a pinch, but I have a bruise now too so I think I may need to switch to the other side. That sucks, because the other side isn’t quite so numb. My cousin (the one with triplets) called me a chicken. Heh.

So I’m feeling good right now. Glad to be moving forward, and I feel confident and calm about this cycle. I can’t predict what will happen. All I can do is hope and pray and take care of myself and trust that Something Good Will Happen. Let’s all keep chanting “Augusts pain brings Mays babies…” (And yes, I said babies. What’s your point? Darnit if I have to poke myself every day for 9-12 days and then have another big shot and several vaginal u/s I better get 2 for the price of one! heh. )

On Saturday, I have a vag u/s and bloodwork. At that point they may or may not adjust my meds. I go back again on Monday for the same thing. We are looking at a tentative trigger date of next Wednesday, but that is highly subjective.

I’m off to bed. And feel free to ask me questions if I left something out that you really want to know.

I finished Magdalenas hat today. It’s super cute. The picture doesn’t show you the details in the wool, but the orange has little specks of red in it. I’d LOVE to knit her a wool coat, and even have the pattern. But I would have had to start that last winter. heh. Now that I have the hat done, I can color coordinate the jacket. And I have some wool left so hopefully I can make her some mittens. When I lanolize these things, they’ll be waterproof and warm, ready for playing in the snow!

I’m posting photos in batches over at Flickr. You have to be a friend to view my photos, so if you want to see them then leave a comment with your user name and I’ll add you as a contact. I hope you all understand why we’re doing this. With all of the talk about people ripping off photos and using them for gross purposes, Erich and I feel a bit safer behind closed doors so to speak. And it won’t be a problem as long as I know you. If you are a lurker, please leave a bit about yourself or direct me to your blog.

There will still be the occasional photo here, but the bulk will be at Flickr. I know you can’t get enough of my gorgeous daughter. Flickr accounts are free, so go on now, go sign up. **wink**

I’ll be canning for the next few days. Look for me then.

I’m around, but feeling a bit sorry for myself these days. It seems everywhere I turn around online someone is pregnant or just had a baby. And so consequently I’m feeling all whiney and bitchy and generally not happy about the situation I’m in. I know that nobody enjoys being infertile, but seriously, this bites the big one. Man I hope this next cycle works.

You would not believe how incredibly excited I am about this movie coming out! It is absolutely my favorite musical of all time! Have I ever told you guys that I was a vocal performance/music education major? Well, I was.

Isn’t this exciting?

And it’s so close to me! You can bet your bottom dollar that when I have another baby (or two!) I’ll be out there donating all my oversupply. I totally qualify to (except for not birthing in the past 12 months.) But seriously, I’ll be a frequent visitor.

HSG was very very very painful. Ouch. Oh. Ouch. But I saw my ovaries and my tubes and they are hanging out in there going “hello! We are perfect and waiting for a baby! Send something my way!” Ms. Uterus is very angry with me right now saying things like “how dare you send such vile stuff up here in my beautiful home. Now I must clean with a vengence!”

Dr. declared my uterus perfect and normal. Woot. SO the plan… that’s what you’re all waiting for right?

Thursday I go in for a drug conference. They teach me how to inject drugs into my flabby (yet partially numb) tummy. (I had a csection and yes part of my nerves never really got the hint to start working again.) They’ll give me all the stuff to order my meds. Once the meds arrive I can stop the birth control and five days later start the injections. No waiting to bleed! yay! In a perfect world, I can stop the pills in anticipation of the day the send the drugs and start the next day. This is all dependent on Erichs erm sample coming back A. OK. But I’m not really worried about that.

I’m outta here. I’m off to have my uterus shot up with radioactive dye. I hope your day is as good and even better than mine!

Being 18 months old is really hard work.

The other day I playfully smacked Erich on the bottom with a spatula while we were all in the kitchen making dinner. Well, Magdalena picked up on it and did it a few times just laughing. We all laughed. When she seemed to be getting to rough, we’d gently remind her to “play gently, be nice!”

Just a few minutes ago, she found a play spatula from her little kitchen and came up and smacked me on the bottom and giggled! All I have to say is, um, oops.

Because I wanna be like Julee.

Google your name in quotes with an “is” — ex.: “(your name) is” — pick your favorite ten responses and post them.

1)Suzanne is hitting the road this summer

2) Suzanne is able to paint a palpable picture of the status of corporate coaching, define critical issues and provide tips for successful execution of coaching initiatives.

3)First, Suzanne is definitely not a Korean name; it’s a Western or American name.

4)Suzanne is a natural teacher and believes her job is to facilitate others in becoming their own authority so they can heal their own lives and create a life with meaning and purpose.

5)Suzanne is a breeder of German Shepherd dogs, usually producing one litter per year.

6)Suzanne is currently unavailable for consultations (in person or by phone).

7) Suzanne is a highly sought after agent in the Santa Barbara and surrounding areas.

I love the fact that Suzanne is truly a poet not just a song smith.

9) ‘I Am Suzanne’ is an astonishing film, one of the most original movies I’ve ever seen … and yet it reminds me of several others.

10) Chez Suzanne is a cozy two bedroom apartment sitting at the foot of a tiny medieval hill village known for the ruins of the Marquis de Sade’s chateau. (this one is the coolest!)

Well, I tackled the embroidery machine. And it simply rocks. I ordered the necessary software that I needed and I’m done for the week until it gets here. I opted to not use sew on tags for my diapers and just use an embroidered label. That way it never tears off or washes out. I HATE when I have a WAHM diaper that I can’t identify because you can no longer read the label. With the embroidered label, there shouldn’t be any of those problems.

Erich has been gone since 8am this morning. He had two service calls for the computer repair business and then was going to drop off a fixed computer and come home. Well at about 2pm he called to tell me that there was a third call. At 4ish he said he was going to get the repaired computer (he had to stop at the shop to get it and such) and then was coming home. Well, he just called and said that he had dropped off the repaired computer but there is now a 4th call to go to. Urgh. It’s awful to have him away so long. It is really nice that he is making so much extra money and that we will be able to pay down bills and such but we miss him. And it’s so hard to be without an extra parent all week long.

Okay I’m done rambling. Since I’ve been working on the embroidery machine most of the day I haven’t done much around the house. We had to make an emergency trip out of town because I broke a needle on my serger and I didn’t have a spare, so that ate up a bunch of time too. All I really want to do though is curl up on the couch and watch TV.